I’ve always felt backwards in this life since I was young. I thought different. I acted different. I just was different. I always felt like I was going “in through the outdoor,” just like in Prince’s, Raspberry Beret, song.
I’m not diagnosed with Asperger’s. As many women experience, the intake specialist she me down before she even listened to why I felt I have Asperger’s. In spite of that, nothing has rung truer for me than when I look and compare myself to the symptoms of Asperger’s.
All the way back to when I was an infant, I can find strings of symptoms all tied together in one big title called Asperger’s. But because I don’t have a diagnosis, it is easy to dismiss that I struggle with anything worse than the next person.
Part of this blog is to remind me in my very crazy life, that I am struggling with something bigger than myself. So when I have a meltdown or an anxiety attack or want to berate myself for not behaving “properly” according to “industry standard,” that I can give myself a break.
Beyond that, I’m still finding my direction.